Build your private board of directors: let growth no longer be lonely or blind

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In this era where the speed is almost suffocating, career paths are no longer straight and are diverse. AI has changed the nature of work, and the market prospects have become chaotic and unclear; and each of us is like a set of software that must update itself from time to time.

But the reality is that it is often difficult to upgrade alone. If we want to complete self-update, we need a system and method.

Behind everyone’s growth, there is a group of people who shape your views and promote your actions. They may not be your company’s supervisors or family members, but a group of people who can give you strength, pull you up, or even throw cold water on you and challenge your views at critical moments.

I call such people your private board of directors.

A person’s success is never the result of being alone

The reason why companies have a board of directors is to supervise and make decisions and ensure that the company’s operations do not deviate from the direction. In our lives, we also need a board of directors of our own to help us review, adjust and move forward regularly.

The board of directors (or board of directors) is the highest governance of a joint stock company. B8%E6%B2%BB%E7%90%86) organization is composed of a number of directors, whose representative is called chairman or the chairman of the board of directors. The main content of the meeting is to vote on various major proposals (covering production, finance, and personnel).

Based on my many years of experience in providing consulting services to companies, I have observed that when many people are stuck in the workplace, their first reaction is to suspect that they are not working hard enough. But in fact, the problem is not that the efforts are not enough, but that the feedback mechanism is too poor. There is no one to help you see the direction, no one to challenge your thinking, and no one to remind you that you should take a rest. Over time, people will fall into a kind of high-efficiency blindness.

I firmly believe that real growth does not rely on brute force, but on systems. Having said that, this system is your interpersonal structure. You need people in different roles such as mentors, coaches, supporters, challengers, and peers to form a network that is both flexible and supportive.

When you hesitate at a certain turning point in your life, they will help you see your rhythm again.

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Mentor: Someone who makes you look up and see the road

A mentor is not someone who appears in your life every day, but what he says often stays in your heart for several years. They won’t tell you directly which way to go, but will help you see which path is more worth taking.

I remember when I was confused about my career many years ago, an elder said to me: “What you should do now is not to leave the old stage, but to expand your stage.”

That sentence was like a light, illuminating the chaos I was in at that time. From that moment on, I understood that the so-called transformation is not to overthrow oneself, but to extend oneself.

The existence of a mentor allows you to look up and see the road when you are exhausted. They remind you not to be tied down by the small achievements in front of you, nor be intimidated by temporary setbacks. The value of a mentor does not lie in the answers, but in the direction—that he helps you see a bigger “you”.

Coach: Someone who helps you move from knowing to doing

The coach is another kind of existence.

If a mentor is like a lighthouse, then a coach is like a rower who rows with you. He does not guide you from afar, but is by your side, helping you adjust your rhythm, correct your movements, and accompany you to arrive.

I once coached a corporate lecturer who was full of energy in class, but completely lost her confidence when recording online courses. We spent three weeks working together to unpack the sources of camera anxiety, practice eye contact, and design gestures.

During that time, I watched her go from knowing what to do to actually doing it! Having said that, this is the value of coaching, which can make growth replicable and operable.

Coaches always remind us that knowledge will not automatically transform into abilities unless someone walks with you across the action gap. He may not know better than you, but he knows better how to make you break through. Just like the 2025 World Series that just ended, Dave Roberts, the head coach of the Los Angeles Dodgers of the United States, perfectly explained this point.

Supporter: the person who keeps you from falling apart

But people are not machines. It is not enough to have a direction and a method. What really makes people grow is emotional endurance.

Frankly speaking, we’ve all experienced that late-night moment when we know we should persevere, but feel we can’t hold on any longer.

At that time, you need a supporter.

Supporters may not necessarily understand your profession, but they understand you as a person. They don’t criticize or guide, they just remind you when you are most tired: “You are already on a good journey.”

Sometimes, just saying “I believe you” is enough to make you restart your engine.

This reminds me of an entrepreneurial friend who fell into depression after failing to raise funds for several months. His partner said to him: “It’s not that you can’t do it, it’s just that the market is not ready to welcome you.”

This sentence kept him going and allowed him to turn around half a year later.

The power of supporters is often silent, but that trust cannot be exchanged for any KPI.

Challenger: The person who keeps you awake

If your supporters are your safe haven, then your challengers are your mirror. They are the ones who are willing to look directly at your shortcomings and dare to say things you don’t want to hear.

I have a good friend who is very ruthless every time he reads my manuscript. He would say: “Your writing is too smooth. It seems like something is missing?”

Although those words stung at the moment, looking back, they were the reminder I needed most. Because the challenger is not responsible for making you comfortable, but for keeping you awake.

In this age of self-assertion and excessive politeness, those who dare to speak the truth have become rare. But precisely because of this, challengers are so valuable.

They are like an honest mirror, helping you correct your self-perception; they let you remember that growing up is not just about rushing forward, but also about knowing when to correct the course.

Peers: People who make you not alone

To be honest, the value of peers is often underestimated. Because they seem ordinary, but they provide the most realistic mirror image.

You and they are at a similar stage and facing similar challenges. When you see them working hard, falling, and getting back up again, it’s a comfort and a reminder.

For example, some of my fellow graduate students who are studying for PhDs and masters and I regularly [communicate and share] online (https://www.facebook.com/groups/thesisdojo). Some people don’t know how to analyze data, some need help filling out questionnaires, and some are severely hit by review comments from academic journals…

All of this is indeed the scenery of the postgraduate study process. But every discussion and sharing is like looking at ourselves in the mirror, not only seeing others, but also looking at ourselves. I think that everyone has been inspired and grown to some extent. Not only have they gradually completed their own research, but they are also glad to have the opportunity to meet colleagues and encourage each other on the academic road.

It is true that such peer relationships can make growth more directional and rhythmic.

You know that you are not alone, but a group of people are walking on the road of learning together. That feeling is like a quiet power that keeps you from giving up easily no matter how tired you are.

Sustaining Your Board of Directors: The Rhythm and Heart of Relationships

It is easy to build a relationship, but difficult to maintain a relationship. Especially the five roles mentioned above cannot appear only when you need them. A personal board of directors that can truly operate for a long time depends not on connections but on a stable rhythm.

I have a habit of doing a review every quarter, and I will also write a thank you letter to the teachers who have helped me, and briefly report on the growth of this quarter. Don’t ask for a reply, but let the other person know that I still take his words to heart.

As for interactions with peers, I regularly communicate once a month to review each other’s goals.

As for my supporters, I’ve learned to express my gratitude through actions—not just saying thank you, but spending more time with the things they care about. You know, the essence of relationship is never exchange, but co-creation. Therefore, when you are willing to give first, take the initiative first, and be grateful first, those connections will slowly become your backing.

When AI becomes the sixth director

I often wonder, can people in the AI era also have a sixth director?

The answer is yes. Because although AI will not replace people, it can assist people - becoming your never-tiring think tank.

For example, when I’m conceptualizing a course or writing a paper, I ask ChatGPT to act as the challenger. I enter a research hypothesis and let it raise counterexamples or questions. Although sometimes its questions are even more pointed than the person’s, it’s actually good and forces me to reexamine my logic.

Of course, AI can also become a coach - helping you organize information and assist in planning action steps. Or become an extension of your mentor, allowing you to simulate decisions ahead of time.

The Private Board of Directors of the future is no longer just a relationship between people, but a smart network of human-machine collaboration. If you can use AI to expand your depth of thinking, you can also use interpersonal relationships to maintain the temperature. The combination of these two is the real future work force.

Growth never requires walking alone

I now teach part-time at a university, and I often say to those lovely college students: “Your campus life or club experience is like running a board of directors.”

The reason is simple, because no one can grow in a vacuum, and no one can see all the blind spots on their own.

Mentors make you look up at the road, coaches help you strengthen your execution, supporters give you psychological endurance, challengers force you to reflect, and peers keep you from being alone. And AI is quietly becoming the sixth invisible director - helping you amplify the energy of thinking and action.

In this rapidly changing world, the greatest sense of security never comes from a stable environment, but from a stable support system. Only those who understand you, believe in you, challenge you and are willing to accompany you can help you avoid detours and go further in the long journey of life.

So, stop fighting alone. Take the initiative to establish your private board of directors!

Because when it comes to growing up, the smartest decision is never to work harder, but to find the right person and go together.

⋯ ✦ ⋯

Growth should not be a lonely practice. You deserve a Private Board of Directors that truly understands, supports and drives you forward.

If you are also looking for your own mentors, coaches and peers, welcome to learn more about courses and services.

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Further reading

• “Vista’s Little Voice”: How to find your own keywords
• “Self-home Entrepreneurship Bible” teaches you to develop multiple sources of income: take stock of resources and do things that you like and that are helpful to others
• [Podcast] Personal brand management practice: How to define your own personal brand?

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